Quotes by Craig Bruce

Think Tank, noun: The shower.
- Craig Bruce
Anything on paper is obsolete!
- Craig Bruce
1 + 1 = 2. Everything else is derived.
- Craig Bruce
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If the shoe fits, it is probably worn out.
- Craig Bruce
The Thought Police: To censor and protect.
- Craig Bruce
Something is always simple until you try it.
- Craig Bruce
The only thing that is obscene is censorship.
- Craig Bruce
'Programming' is a four-letter word.
- Craig Bruce
Never underestimate the power of a simple tool.
- Craig Bruce
Don't judge a book by its thickness either.
- Craig Bruce
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The world is real. Consciousness is the illusion.
- Craig Bruce
It's funny how most activists are pacifists.
- Craig Bruce
Now is the time for all good men to run like hell.
- Craig Bruce
I think; therefore, I am the center of the universe.
- Craig Bruce
Temporary solutions often become permanent problems.
- Craig Bruce
In order for a man to be truly evil, he must be a woman.
- Craig Bruce
Nothing surpasses the beauty and elegance of a bad idea.
- Craig Bruce
When trying to locate something, search your mind first.
- Craig Bruce
Supermarket automatic doors open for me; therefore, I am.
- Craig Bruce
Things always look better when you haven't seen them.
- Craig Bruce
Liberalism is financed by the dividends from Conservatism.
- Craig Bruce
It's easy to idealize someone that you don't know.
- Craig Bruce
You usually have to wait for that which is worth waiting for.
- Craig Bruce
Silence is a statement that is open to gross misinterpretation.
- Craig Bruce
When shooting in the dark, it is a good idea to use a machine gun.
- Craig Bruce
Whoever invented double clicking should be shot in the head! Twice!
- Craig Bruce
From each according to his ability, to each according to his ability.
- Craig Bruce
When you talk to yourself, at least you know that someone is listening.
- Craig Bruce
Time is a resource whose supply is inversely proportional to its demand.
- Craig Bruce
Even IBM can't stand in the way of progress... for more than a decade.
- Craig Bruce
Don't trust anyone who has been in school for the past 24 consecutive years.
- Craig Bruce
If I gave a damn what other people think of me, I would be more like other people.
- Craig Bruce
Never question the relevance of truth, but always question the truth of relevance.
- Craig Bruce
My to-do list is so long that it doesn't have an end; it has an event horizon.
- Craig Bruce
When anarchy is declared, the first thing we do, let's kill all the anarchists.
- Craig Bruce
When you are finished with it, put it back in the first place that you looked for it.
- Craig Bruce
Geez, all that money we waste on space exploration; just think how many bombs that would buy!
- Craig Bruce
The people who actually do things always suffer the slings and arrows of those who don't.
- Craig Bruce
It's hardware that makes a machine fast. It's software that makes a fast machine slow.
- Craig Bruce
Live every day as if it is your last, and you'll be correct sooner than you otherwise would be.
- Craig Bruce
The entire universe is working against me. I can't believe the entire universe could be that foolish!
- Craig Bruce
The difference between being able to understand something and inventing it in the first place... is called genius.
- Craig Bruce
Fighting a war on terrorism is like fighting against crime. We can never hope to eradicate crime, so we shouldn't bother fighting it.
- Craig Bruce
It's funny how social activists usually protest against the only things that have a credible chance of achieving the activists' goals.
- Craig Bruce
Yeah, computers are going to take over the programming business because they have become so fast recently that they can solve the Halting Problem in five seconds flat.
- Craig Bruce
The only people I've ever heard saying that disagreeing with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld is un-American or treasonous are people who disagree with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld.
- Craig Bruce
It's a bit odd that nobody seems to be using the correct technical term to describe organized Islamic terrorists. They are not a faction of a religion or a social movement. They are a cult. A suicide cult.
- Craig Bruce
Why are people unemployed? Because there is no work. Why is there no work? Because people are not buying products and services. Why are people not buying products and services? Because they have no money. Why do people have no money? Because they are unemployed.
- Craig Bruce
Organizations like the ACLU fought and won the good fight back in the 1960's, but it's clear that nowadays they've run out of useful things to do since they now spend most of their time defending the scum of the Earth from getting what they rightly deserve.
- Craig Bruce
I wonder if those people shown protesting the deployment of nuclear weapons to western Europe during the Reagan era are feeling appropriately stupid today. 'Please don't take away our precious Soviet Union! - We demand the annihilation of all life on Earth!'
- Craig Bruce

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